Submitted by: Submitted by crzy8
Views: 283
Words: 401
Pages: 2
Category: Other Topics
Date Submitted: 05/31/2011 09:08 AM
Anthony,
When communicating in a class forum it is important to use inclusive language or you might offend another student. What you did in your answer to a discussion question obviously offended a female classmate and that is something you will want to avoid doing in the future.
When looking at your answer I noticed that you used a lot of words like boys, men, and guys. What you should have done was be more general. For example, in your statement
“I’m not a manager, but want to be one, so I figured I’d better polish up on my etiquette while talking to some of the good old boys at the top.” Notice how you wrote some of the good old boys at the top. Many businesses, including yours, most likely have more than men working at the top and for you not to give credit to the women can definitely offend someone. Another statement that you made that could have definitely offended a woman is ”At a company conference I saw this business lady give a presentation on etiquette. I was surprised because she had a lot of good things to say”. I personally wouldn’t get offended by this statement but for someone else they might think that what you are saying is that you don’t expect a woman to have good things to say. You could have rephrased that sentence to say something like, “At a conference I went to, I saw a really great presentation on business etiquette”. One last comment I noticed that can really set a woman off was when you said “I recommend that any man who wants to advance in the business world should seriously consider brushing up on his etiquette, just like I did.” That last statement makes it seem like you don’t think a woman can use etiquette to advance in the business world like men can. In the future you might want to rephrase something like that into saying that you recommend anyone who wants to advance in the business world to use etiquette.
These are just a few pointers to use in the future to make sure that you do not offend another classmate. You have to...