Short Story

Believe and Strive

By: Ellaine Giselle B. Germino

It’s 2:00am and my eyes are still wide awake. Sitting silently close to the small window enough for me to peak and stare at the dark blue, velvet sky. Dreaming that I’m one of those bright stars that shines in the dark. It’s been 3 years since I last saw and heard the voice of my family. By the time the greatest breakdown of my life happened, I decided to cut my connection with them. I was so ashamed and angry. I can’t blame anyone but myself.

“Is this what you pay for all that we sacrificed just for you three to study?”, Pa yelled, filled with anger. I can’t almost feel my body and I can’t say a word and I couldn’t even breathe. “All we wanted is that you to finish college! We don’t need you to have medals or to be one of Kreme dela kreme but all we wanted you is to be responsible of your studies to be able to finish them so you can have a job.”, scolded grandmother too. My mom was just silently sitting beside me. Her eyes glimmering with pain and disappointment. Hopeless. “I-I-I’m sorry.”, That’s all I can manage to say. Avoiding my tears to rush down my cheeks while looking to the floor. My mind is throbbing and my body felt numb. “Your stupidity, laziness especially your homosexuality is way too enough to deserve and achieve nothing. Leave.” I didn’t say a single word anymore to beg for him because I already decided to leave before he say it. Ma begged Pa to take back his word and also begged me to stay. “I don’t want my daughter to get her life at risk! You’re just a child! Please, Xeria, Stay with us.” “Ma, I’m not a child anymore. I’m sorry, I really know and I admit it’s all my fault that I’ve been vanished out of the university. I’m sorry ma, I wasn’t able to have my diploma. I’m sorry I wasted all your efforts. I know I deserve this punishment. In fact this isn’t enough as a punishment for all the burdens that I’ve brought to you, ma. Please let me fix this. Let me fix myself and my broken...