Gm 410

First Paragraph

Use the first paragraph to thank the reader. For example, if the reader was a job applicant that was not hired, the first sentence could state:

"Thank you for your application to XYZ. We had many qualified applicants and we gave your application careful consideration. As you are aware, there were only a handful of positions, therefore the hiring decision was that much more difficult."

If the reader is a vendor whose services you will no longer be using, a sentence such as this could be generated:

"We have enjoyed a positive and profitable working relationship between [reader's company name] and XYZ. Over the last ____ years, we have found your company to be a great help in fulfilling our clients’ needs. Your assistance has been invaluable."

For a reader that applied for credit with your company, the first sentence could read:

"Thank you for your recent application for credit with us. We thoroughly reviewed your application and gave it careful consideration."

The key to the first paragraph is to make the reader feel as if their time, service and patronage was appreciated.

Second Paragraph

Delivering bad news is akin to removing a Band-Aid. It is better to remove it with one steady motion. At this point, there is no reason to not to get straight to the point. Using the examples from above, the second paragraph could read something like this:

Job applicant: "Although we were impressed with your qualifications and skills, we have chosen a different candidate for the position."

Vendor: "As you are aware, the economic climate is changing, and therefore we are forced to examine our current needs. Although we have enjoyed a successful working relationship in the past, we find that we are no longer in need of your services. This is no reflection of the quality of your goods -- we are simply going in a different direction."

Credit Application: "Unfortunately, we are unable to extend credit to you at this time."

It is best not to explain more...