Marriage

What Is Marriage?

If you look up marriage in the dictionary it is defined as “The state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband and wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law” (Merriam-Webster Dictionary).

I think that once you are “united by law”, it definitely feels that way. Everything changes. You are out of the fun dating stage or the excited to get married stage. You’re now a ball and chain and it feels that way too. Things become stressful. A stressful feeling that you never knew you could feel. I’m not saying it is all bad but it’s definitely a change.

My idea of marriage was a simple one, you fall in love, get married and have a family. I have found that things are not as they appear! Marriage is work! Sure while you are dating it’s all fun and games. You fall in love, get engaged and start to plan your dream wedding. That is when you realize nothing is simple. Weddings cost money, a lot of money. With each day you realize your bank account is decreasing in funds. Now, you get a conjoined bank account. Before you’re married, you feel married.

Marriage is work....HARD fucking work!!! It is about commitment and compromise. You can no longer be selfish. Selfish no longer exists in your vocabulary. My money is your money and your money is my money however, you find yourself asking your husband or wife if it’s okay to take money out of your joint account. Marriage is working hard to pay bills, together. It’s cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry, cutting the grass, and so much more. It’s not just doing those things anymore it’s debating on which one of us is going to do which “chore”. After long days at work neither one of us wants to come home and cook. Like I said....marriage is work!

Some days I struggle to put my best face on. I yank clothes out of the hamper, yet to be laundered, since I have had no time to do them. I smooth out the wrinkles hoping no one will notice today’s outfit was Tuesdays. I ran...