Practical Communication Discussion Questions

(1) Explain how the meaning that is expressed by the way something is said can sometimes be more important than the meaning of what is said. (One of my favorite posters reads “What you do speaks so loudly—I can’t hear what you are saying.)

When verbally expressing yourself, the words alone do not deliver the meaning or intent. Words coupled with tone of voice, body language, and gestures (kinesics) deliver a complete message. For example, let’s say I am verbally welcoming a new employee to the organization; however I am wearing a disapproving scowl. While the words may be warm and welcoming, the expression is cold and inhospitable, probably causing the new employee to feel something other than genuinely welcomed. Darwin said, “These expressions evolved because they allow us to know immediately the difference between strangers who are friendly and those who might attack” (Jandt, 2013, pg. 107). While that may not be consistent with our daily lives, it does ring true in the likelihood of determining who is friend and who is foe.

Nonverbal communication “refers to a source’s actions and attributes that are not purely verbal” and can be narrowly used to refer to intentional use, as in using a non-spoken symbol to communicate a specific message” (Jandt, 2013, pg. 109). One of the functions of nonverbal communication is sending uncomfortable messages. We can convey feelings that may otherwise be awkward to say by the use of our nonverbals. Another function would be reinforcing and modifying verbal messages. It can be like when your friend asks you if you like her new (horrible) dress, you may say “sure” but you expression says “that is a hot mess” and your friend gets your meaning without you actually having to say the words. “Nonverbal messages can reinforce the verbal message” (Jandt, 2013, pg. 113). For example, simply saying the words, “I love you,” can be powerful for some, but for many the mere act of speaking the words are not enough to...